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Early Life, Coll

Early Life & Family

I was born on October 13, 1981, at Beaumont Hospital in Royal Oak, MI—a date that oddly coincides with the infamous Friday the 13th event tied to the Knights Templar, the Papal Bull, and Baphomet. I grew up in Ferndale, MI, in a stable lower-middle-class home. My parents still live in the same house, and my old room remains largely untouched, a time capsule of my childhood—Nintendo Power posters, Ticketmaster tickets, punk show flyers, ICP memorabilia, and even Yo! MTV Raps cards.

My dad worked as a mechanic, and my mom was a stay-at-home mom. I was close with my grandparents, often spending Saturdays at their house. My grandma was surprisingly into Nintendo, playing kid-friendly and puzzle games like Tetris and Dr. Mario. She even had an Odyssey console, which was pretty cool.

I have an older brother, Mark, and an older sister, Stacy. We were close growing up, spending time wrestling WWF-style in the backyard, playing baseball, and shooting hoops at Wilson Park. Our neighborhood was tight-knit—everyone knew each other from sports and trading video games. On University Street, between Woodward and Paxton, I had, at some point, been inside every house on the block. I wonder if neighborhoods are still like that today.

My brother was amazing and bought us our first PC; a top-of-the-line Packard Bell Pentium 90. We used to play games like X-COM, Warcraft, and Master of Orion, just to name a few. We had a Super Nintendo and a modded/hacked PlayStation 1 that played pirated games. We'd also spend a lot of time at the mall; it was a thing back then, kind of like the Mallrats movies. We watched and went to a lot of movies at the Oakland and Universal malls.

Hobbies & Interests

As kids, my brother and I collected sports cards—mostly Topps, which, in hindsight, was kind of boring. Eventually, I started collecting comics, Marvel trading cards, and Star Wars collectible card games. When the Star Wars re-releases came out, I grabbed the associated action figures, thinking they’d gain value like the originals—not the best investment strategy.

Money was hard to come by, so I’d collect cans at Michigan recreation areas for the 10-cent deposit and mow my grandparents' and great-grandparents’ lawns to fund my comic book habit. Comics Café in Ferndale and Time Travelers in Berkley (which I think is still around) were my go-to spots.

We had a few pets—Goofy, a pointer mix who passed when I was five or six; Whiskers, a cat who lived around 15 years; and a bunch of fish, including bullhead catfish I caught myself. A stray cat we named “Belly” had an amazing personality and would somehow climb onto the garage roof and come into my bedroom through the window.

School Days

I attended Woodrow Wilson Elementary, where my main obsession was mastering every Nintendo game I could get my hands on. I grew up watching The Simpsons, Ren & Stimpy, Sanford and Son, MAS*H, and game shows like Family Feud and The Price Is Right.

I got into computers early—my friend Ben had a pre-386 machine, and we played games like Scorched Earth. I was also introduced to porn at a young age by Robert Prevost, which, looking back, is pretty hilarious.

My brother was big into making mixtapes by recording songs off the radio, which introduced me to Beastie Boys, Run-DMC, David Lee Roth, Bon Jovi, Guns N’ Roses, and Van Halen. Meanwhile, my sister had a short-lived stint in band, playing the flute. Because she quit, my parents refused to let me join, even though I scored second in my grade on a music aptitude test. The school offered me a trumpet, but my parents shut it down.

Around second grade, my dad bought 10 acres in rural Hadley, Michigan. We spent weekends clearing trees, planting, camping, and building a road into the property. There was a pond and an old Massey Ferguson tractor, which was fun to mess around with. My dad still owns the land, but it’s overgrown now. I’d love to throw a small festival there someday if he’d allow it.

Middle School Years

I attended Calvin Coolidge Junior High, where I spent most of my time playing video games, reading comics, and going to school dances and basketball games. I gravitated toward the “bad kids” but never got into trouble myself. Middle school culture shifted towards rap, and I was placed in advanced math but later wiggled out of it. By eighth grade, I skipped so much school that there were threats of holding me back.

I briefly played football in seventh grade as a running back but broke my forearm—it was a gnarly break that literally took the shape of a football.

High School & Finding My Crowd

I got into ICP in high school as they were local to the Ferndale area. As we know, once a Juggalo, you're a Juggalo for life.

Freshman year, I was allowed to join the football team. I also tried out for basketball, but the coaching staff was all related and had a clear bias against white players. I joined the wrestling team, which I enjoyed for the conditioning, but I didn’t continue into sophomore year.

Around this time, I started hanging out with the weirdo artists, poets, and musicians at Gotham City Café. I also spent a lot of time in the 4th & Main area of Royal Oak with the punk/alternative crowd. I became good friends with Keith and Nancy at The Cat’s Meow, and while I wasn’t particularly close to Keith, the owner of Noir Leather, I knew some of his staff. This was also when the OG Detroit Terror Team started coming together.

My first real girlfriend was Raina, though it only lasted a month or two—I was pretty awkward with women back then. By junior year, I began attending Oakland Technical Center in the afternoons, taking classes in drafting (AutoCAD), machine shop, and business services. I almost earned my Novell CNA certification. Around this time, my dad gave me my first vehicle—an old 1977 Chevrolet C10 ½-ton pickup.

A major part of my high school years was going to underground warehouse techno parties in Detroit—an absolute golden age for the scene. I was a regular...in a cow suit. My first big music event was the Van’s Warped Tour in 1996, its inaugural year. Face to Face, Goldfinger, The Deftones, and Sick of It All played. By summer 1997, I was regularly attending punk shows as “The Cow Guy” in a cheap Halloween cow costume. I went to shows at venues like The Wired Frog in Eastpointe, St. Andrew’s Hall, The Shelter, The State Theatre, The Magic Stick, and Clutch Cargo’s in Pontiac. I was especially close to a band called Hoppin’ Mad.

During this time, I also started binge drinking, but I managed to stay out of trouble.

A Turning Point: Senior Year & Beyond

In 1999, my grandpa passed away, which hit me hard. Interestingly, it also motivated me to turn my school attendance around—I hardly missed a day after that. I graduated in the top 10% of my class.

During my senior year, I started dating Lydia, a relationship that lasted 5 ½ years and heavily influenced my future. But that’s a story for another post.

this blog will be updated and doesn't include my time and adventures in Colubus, OH, New Jersey, and up to date in Chicago and needs a complete detailed rewrite.